- We put the TEAM first, PLAYERS second and everything else last. At this point, my peace of mind is no longer an issue. At this point, I have put hours into my decision and my speech.
- Talk with players individually. If you talk with them in groups, then you receive the opinion of the group…...or of the group leader. In addition, that is nearly useless. In order to know how a decision will affect your team, you need to know how it will affect the individuals.
- Notice how I never said, “We can’t win unless……………….” Effort, commitment, etc. come first. Winning is a natural result of good kids put in a good environment. If you were only concerned with winning, your email would have said, “How can I compromise to keep this person on my team?”
- Also notice that I never said, “Cynthia, I need you to do this for me,” b/c most kids do not do things for their coaches. Yes, I will say, “I need you to…...” or I may have to say, “This is way it will be,” but most players behave in ways that satisfy themselves first and then maybe their teammates. So our conversation does not center on me.
- I did not criticize the previous coach. If I had to comment on the previous coach, I would say, “His ways are his ways and his ways aren’t my ways. They are not necessarily wrong. I just don’t do it his way.”
- Moreover, notice how I never put the player down, even though I may disagree with her. I will never say, “You were such a bum last year.” In fact, I tried to do the opposite. I attempted to tell her how much she’s liked by her teammates and her coach and how much she could gain from being with us and giving her best effort.
- However, even though I am encouraging her to change her behavior, it is still “MY WAY OR THE HIGHWAY.” I have told her my requirements. There will be no more compromise. Now she must decide.
The Ball Will Be Back In Your Court Everyday!
Now, you have done all the preliminary stuff. Now you MUST enforce your decision. If she decides to play, she will probably tell everyone on the team about your conversation. That is cool. That is what kids do. Now you must fulfill your end of the bargain. She agreed to give you 100%, but she probably will not if she discovers that you are not serious. How does the old jingle go…...”You asked for it, you got it.”What do you think about this? Tell me your opinion. I am looking forward to hear what you have to say.
Have a great summer!
Please visit my camp website sometime.
If you are ever in the Virginia area, please stop by!
Tom